Barefoot Monday

Next week it could be a Barefoot Thursday, or I could have a Barefoot Friday this week, or I could quit altogether after today, but tonight's dinner is coming from the Barefoot Contessa's cookbook that I was given for Christmas. I'm still debating what I'm going to make but I'll update this by tonight and you'll see how it went. Wish me luck!

Christmas. Check.

Christmas is finished. I'm happy and sad. There really is no other holiday that completely takes over entire families like Christmas does. Everyone feels obligated to be nice and to visit with people you wouldn't normally visit with during the other parts of the year, and if they are anything like me, instead of reminding them why they don't visit normally it reminds them that they are a jerk for having missed out on their company for so long. I love Christmas because it makes me feel like a jerk; and for at least a few weeks after the holidays I keep those folks in mind and I call and email and may visit a time or two, but it's too bad the holiday spirit doesn't stick around after the holidays. That would rock, but then again it would just be July, not the holidays anymore, but if everyone kept the holiday spirit year round I guess we wouldn't miss the holiday time of year, because it would be all year. Get spirity people! Let's holiday the crap out of this year!

This Christmas Erik was adamant about us not getting stressed out by bouncing back and forth between the families... the families that live five miles apart, the families that understand we have other families to see and visit with and love on. Yeah, he was the only stressing about not stressing, and by the time we finally collapsed onto the last couch of the night he still couldn't relax because he was Stressy McStresserpants. I was eating my second plate of cheesecake by the time he calmed down. Next  year I think I'll make out a chart or timeline or Excel spreadsheet for him. (7:00 Home, 10:00 Porters, 16:00 Rosendahls, 22:00 Home.) I love making lists and spreadsheets so that's no hard thing for me to do, though I don't know if I would be able to handle super serious Daddy with a list, Mommy's with lists are fine but give a Daddy a list and all of a sudden there are bullwhips and cattle prods and "Where are you're shoes, soldier!?" and as much as Erik is suited for that line of torture I'm really excited to see what kind of a monkey wrench a three year old will be in any plans we make for next year. Ha! never underestimate the power of the Laine.

I didnt' take near the amount of pictures this year as I did last year. I was a little busy chasing Laine and eating. Mostly I was eating, so there are a select few photographs this year, but you won't be able to tell the difference seeing as how you only get shown the best anyway. I'll know though, my December '10 folder is tiny compared to my December '09.

So to round up the holiday, here are the best of the few shots I got. I hope every one who celebrates Christmas had a merry one.

 

Sunday Owie

TGI...wtF

One: I think I may have been born too late. I think I was meant to be born nearer the time of the invention of the telephone, so that I could have been devastated by it. I could have become depressed and wandered the halls of my home in a sullen cloud of bereavement over my loss of creativity. Written correspondence at that point in history started to die, as did penmanship and original thought. I think the telephone can be blamed for the fact that there are no more inspirational ideas in Hollywood or the fact that every book I read is a pale comparison of some other book I’ve read. It’s sad really. And I think I should have been born in a time period where I could truly mourn the passing of the letter. I’d write about it now but I haven’t written a letter to anyone in years and my penmanship sucks.

Two: Did you know that at one point in his life Johnny Cash looked into a mirror and said “Let’s kill us both”? What an overwhelmingly philosophical profundity. To look at oneself and realize there are two in one body and to be tired of both.

Three: Is plastic surgery a way to try and God-proof yourself? Isn’t it a bit like turning on the lawn sprinklers to try and prevent the flaming sulfuric acid rain of the Apocalypse from setting fire to your flower garden?

Four: I read a story where a little girl asks an old man how old he is and his answer: “The same age as my little finger and just a little older than my teeth.” How beautiful is that answer?! That's how old I'd like to always be.

Happy Birthday Damone!

So I have this friend and it’s her birthday. Her Facebook says she’s turning 36 but I don’t believe it. I believe its some bigger number; not a larger, older number because the lady looks younger than Laine, really, but a bigger deal kind of number. Like a 5 or 10 number I just don’t know which. So I want to make a big deal of it but I don’t want to pick the wrong number. What if I’m like Happy 40^th and she’s all I’m 25 stupid. So since I’m completely pinned to a wall (because she will never in a million years admit to her actual age) I’ll just have to say Happy 36^th birthday, but in my head I’ll be thinking of grander numbers. 

Love love love!



I love you Damone!

Totally The Worst Epiphany Ever

Whole family around the Christmas tree
Dad: "We talked about it and we agreed to keep it simple; socks, undies, PJ's, maybe a few small toys. I'll be honest, I had my doubts."
Mom: "I have one more gift for you guys!!"
Kids open a Wii
Dad: I don't know how she does it, but she know's what she's doing. And everyday, she' s the reason why we're doing it."
Everybody dancing happily around their gifts.

That's the new Walmart commercial on TV tonight.
I cried.
That's the mom I want to be.
Because that's the family we are.

We are having to scrape together all the pennies we find in the sofa to buy anyone a gift for Christmas this year. I was crying not becasue I thought it was a sweet commercial; though it is for sure. I cried because I have everyone's gift bought and wrapped already.

Everyone but Laine and Erik.

Thanksgiving Weekend Update

Sorry this has taken so long to get written. It hasn’t been because I couldn’t think of anything but that I had so much that typing it out seems like such a huge job, it’s going to take hours (and it did) editing is not my strong suit. I make other people give me the two sentence version of things because I can’t stand to even try for the interest to listen to a story but I can’t whittle my tales down to less than two and a half pages typed. I’m a hypocritical person. Yes, we know this.  

So were to start? Last Wednesday? Oh I was a horrible mother last Wednesday. I was off work and I still took Laine to daycare. I know I know, special place in hell, whatever. I totally got my house spic-n-spanned so that when we got home Friday night I came home to a clean home with fresh sheets to crawl into, it was like getting an extra night on vacation. So yeah, I wasn’t working but I still took Laine to daycare. Hate me if you want, it’ll make me cry, but I got my stuff done. And I was able to spend the rest of my weekend focused on Laine instead of the kitchen counters and laundry like I am most weekends.

So, Wednesday (after I was done being horrible) we headed out to Corsicana. We’d planned to be on the road around noon but didn’t get out of League City until almost 2:00, I worried a little about Laine sleeping during such a long car ride, on the one hand it would be helpful if she slept some of it because I don’t’ have that many car activities for her and there really wasn’t any room for me to sit in the back seat with her, so I was kind of hoping that she slept more than no. on the other hand however if she slept too much in the care she would stay up all night or at least that’s the way it would normally go. For this trip Laine slept the whole way there, we had to wake her up at the bed and breakfast at 6:30. I mean that’s a four and a half hour nap! Well since Laine was awake and would be for a while we decided to drive out to Sydney’s dads house to see Levi for a while but he was coming into town so we met him at Gander Mountain instead. Laine was a holy terror running around the store, in of course the cutest way humanly possible. There was a large wooden stage area where they displayed their bbq pits and smokers and Laine liked how her boots made loud noises when she stomped on the stage. So she stomped. And jumped and danced and fell down and kicked and it was really kind of adorable, even if strangers were staring. After a while we hunted my dad down again and found Levi. LEVI!! It was so good to see him. It’s always a shock to me when I see him after so long and he’s still not 12 years old. I don’t’ know why I expect to see a little kid anymore. He’s huge now and you’d think I would get used to that, but in my head he’s the kid who forgot there was breaks on the snowmobile and almost killed me. Sigh, I miss that kid. 

So we shopped for a bit and then we headed out to Kit’s house. It was warm when we got there so he had all his windows open and it smelled like wood and nature and felt so country and homey I really couldn’t wait to leave so I could come back and spend the whole of Thanksgiving just sitting around that house. After we left Kit’s Wednesday night we headed to Chili’s for quick bite to eat. Mom had stayed at the bed and breakfast because she wasn’t feeling well and we were supposed to bring her back some food. I sent a text saying “Chili’s. want us to bring you anything?” but apparently I didn’t’ send it to mom, I sent it to my boss. Yeah. I got back a text saying “”this is major tom” which was so funny I almost pee’d because who knew that man was funny? I do now. Anyway I was just able to apologies and see that he’d replied to me again when my phone died. I wasn’t able to see that he’d wished me a Happy Thanksgiving until Friday morning.

For the couple of nights prior to us leaving Laine hadn’t been sleeping all that well. She’d wake up and want to be in my room and wouldn’t’ let me sleep so I was completely exhausted Wednesday night, ready to crash and sleep for weeks but the room Erik picked for us since we had out choice from the entire house, was the one with the smallest tallest bed. No way would two adults plus baby be able to sleep in it, plus I almost had to just to get up in it and it terrified me to think of Laine falling off onto the hard wood floors, but that’s the room Erik wanted and since I was tired and whining about it Erik took Laine and slept with her on the futon at the base of the bed. Laine only woke up like four times and popped up her head and called for me, but then she’d drape herself over Erik and pass out again, Erik didn’t wake up once. So except for the four wake ups that I fell right back to sleep after I didn’t get bothered and it was some great sleep. He did the same thing for me Thursday night but I’ll get to that later.

We met mom and dad downstairs for breakfast around 7:30. Coffee was being brewed and eggs and bacon were cooking in the kitchen and I can’t even describe the smell. Old homes and fresh baked rolls and coffee is Heaven. I was in Heaven. No lie. Heaven.
After an amazing breakfast everyone went to their respective corners to shower and get ready for the day. Erik Laine and I had a tiny little one person shower and we all three squeezed in. we did more laughing than washing but it was fun. When everyone was appropriately attired we piled into daddy’s car and headed to the party. We got there a little earlier than the rest of the family so we were able to dig our heels in and get comfortable before meeting all the new people. Most everyone had been at Levi and Sydney’s wedding so there was at least some recognition there for me but I am horrible about remembering names so everyone was ma’am and sir for me. I’m not sure anyone noticed though, I was ma’am and Erik was sir to everyone else too.

Sydney’s family was such a comfortable group of people to be around. When I first started dating Erik I was pretty put off by how different our families were. The Rosendahl’s had no family traditions in common with the Porters at all except for the fact that yes, they did celebrate Christmas. And the food! Different as hummus and mashed potatoes. Rosendahl’s love their onions and olives and Porters don’t. well they do but not in everything they eat. So, tangent that was, all to get to this. The Herrington’s are like the Porters long lost twin. Eating at Kit’s house was like eating at Grandma’s. I was familiar with every seasoning used on the meats, no vegetable casserole was a stranger to me, and I could readily identify every pie cake and cookie. It was like going ton vacation but staying home at the same time. Did I tell you it was Heaven. It was Heaven.

After we all ate our fill the first time half of the party settled in front of the TV to watch the Saints beat the Cowboys. Then they turned on the A&M game and I’m pretty sure there was another one in there too, I was in the other room with the other half of the family, sitting around the fire talking abo9ut politics and religion and enjoying every minute of it. Another thing about the Rosendahl/Porter vs. Herrington/Porter thing I’m envious of. Herrington’s know how to talk instead of debate and debate instead of fight. As much as I love the rowdy throw downs with Erik’s family the witty discussions with Sydney’s family made me feel a little more comfortable, I even threw in a cent or two which I never in a million years would have done with my in-laws.

However nice it was to be around like minded people though, I love my in-laws. They challenge me and keep me on my toes and instead of getting contented which would make me bored I know I have a group of people on my side that will always keep me entertained. I really wouldn’t mind spending more time with the Herrington's thought. It’s amazing to me that something so familiar can feel so refreshing and new.

We finally decided to call it sometime around nine or ten, and headed back to the house for the night. Everyone went directly to their rooms and settled in, I read a few pages and Erik watched a Bond movie until we finally slept at least mostly through the night again.
Friday morning was just as wonderful s the one before it. The lady of our house made us an amazing quiche with biscuits instead of crust. Heaven. We enjoyed our slow morning drinking coffee and letting Laine run around the downstairs of the house for a while.
We have a kind of ghost story about the house we stayed in, apparently when the owners of the house first got the place they had some psychic come by to do whatever they do to see if a place is haunted and the psychic claimed to see a woman standing at the top of the stairs and she described her in detail. A few days later a family member of the previous owners stopped by to give the new owner a photo of the older owner’s family, to put on the wall I guess for historical reference and there in the photo was Miss Fanny. The ghost at the top of the stairs. (Ooooo!) So the new owner told us that anytime anything mysterious happened or if anything was just weird they’d blame it on Miss Fanny. Ha! Well Friday morning I went down to mom and dads room and mom asked us what we were doing upstairs slamming doors and stomping down the stairs in the middle of the night. I’d slept through the whole night so I had no idea what she meant but I told her it was weird that both doors to our room which I had closed incase Laine woke up before me were standing wide open, and mom said that the door on the stairwell that the owners said not to open was standing wide open last night too, letting in freezing cold air and dad had to close it around 2:00 in the morning. So when Erik wakes up we ask him about it, did he stomp around and slam doors last night, he said no, he did open our room doors though and opened the balcony door for a bit to let in some air because the heat had risen to almost 90 degrees in our room, but he closed the outside door and left our open for circulation. (the balcony door is not the door the owner said not to open, Erik said he didn’t’ touch that door, hadn’t even gone near the stairs.) so…. Dun dun dun, that leaves us with someone not Erik stomping upstairs and slamming two door shut. I went upstairs and walked around a bit then came back down and asked mom if she’d heard us walking around she said no, so I went up and down the stairs and she said no it didn’t’ sound like that, I tried a different pair of hoes and she said it was more that those but still not quite so….. Dun dun dun! It’s Miss Fanny! It had to be, we were the only people in the house and no one was admitting to stomping, slamming doors or going near the stairs or opening secret passageway doors. (which is totally what it was)

Gasp! Ghosts!

We were all completely entertained by the idea but not enough to stay another night, so after breakfast and showers we got packed up and checked out. We drove around Corsicana for a while before stopping for lunch at Roy’s. Roy’s is a diner in town that is exactly like the one that Friendswood is missing. Friendswood needs a greasy diner. I’d go at least once a week. Probably more if they served good soup and grilled cheese like Roy's. Before leaving town we stopped by the fruit cake place and the pickle place and bought something at both. It was getting close to 1:30 and Erik then decided to tell me that he had a family thing we were supposed to be doing at 4:00. In Friendswood. Der, maybe we should get going doofus. So we left without being able to see Levi and sydney and kit again which totally made me tear up. And I won’t be okay with it even a little bit until I can get hugs for Christmas.

We made it to Erik’s parents a little before 5:00 to find that the party was actually planned for 6:00 and then even later we found out that James and Cassie were told it was at 7:00, so 7:00 is when we ate and I had been hungry since 4:00, ugh! Alicia made an amazing brie pastry raspberry cracker topper thing that I ate until my stomach hurt though so all was well. Sinner was nice, the company was better, the coffee even better than that. Laine played hard until it was time to go and we finally made it home around 10:00. To a clean house. And clean sheets. It felt like a win.

Harumph!

With all the toast nonsense going on right now I was really in the mood to bitch about something today but I got nothin’. I was thoroughly intending this blog to be about the pharmacy and how they ran me around and I’m all angry and whatnot but they were super helpful and quick and Laine’s prescription that I don’t think I really need but would like to have just in case got refilled.
I called the number on the scrip bottle and entered my scrip number and huffed and puffed a little when the automated message told me they’d have to contact my doctor to get permission to refill the order. Even though I knew that, it says so right there on the bottle it still bugged me. Anyway, I waited about two hours and then I called the number again and entered the Rx number again and waited and they told me that the order was in processing, but what did that mean? Is it getting filled because the doctor okayed it or is it still waiting to be okayed? So I pressed star and waited to talk to a tech, who got on the line before the hold noises got on my nerves and told me that the doctor had authorized the refill with the same directions but that the insurance wouldn’t cover it until the 26th, I’ve got one finger in the air ready to do my best “oh no they di’int” when she tells me but it’ll only be $31 instead of $25. Huh. Okay.
So now I have Laine’s prescription filled and it’ll be ready when I get off work so if Laine has any kind of relapse while we are out of town it’s taken care of. That’s great. That’s awesome. I’m pretty thrilled about not having to worry about that. However I still want something to bitch about. I mean, c’mon! Toast!
I was going to complain that I didn’t have anything to do today but then I got some bolts that need ordering. I was going to complain about not having any lunch today but then I found a bowl of soup in my fridge from Friday. I was going to complain about tons of stuff but now I can’t remember any of it. How messed up is this? I’m perfectly content with how today is going except for the fact that I can’t complain about anything. AH Ha! I can complain about that… no, I can’t... I already did. DRAT! and blast.

Just Plain Mean

Everyday at my office someone makes toast. Everyday I smell the sweet smell of toasty bready goodness waft into my office and I long for it. LONG FOR IT! I want that toast so bad. It’s the best smelling toast I’ve ever smelled. My toast never smells like that. Not even close. And God help me if there’s butter involved. I die. Damn you Ramsey. Damn you and your buttery toast.

So close, and yet so, so far.

Today it was Jack though, and he made a toasted peanut better and jelly sandwich. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? A little sympathy for the folks sitting ten feet from the toaster who do not have the gift of making perfect smelling toast. OH! And the one time I ask someone to toast my bread for me?? They burn it. No joke. This is cruel.

Sick Again

It’s been a few months since the last time Laine was sick. The last time I wrote about her being really sick at all was June, and I’m so grateful that there have been no ear infections or fevers or anything for so long but it feels like maybe it was all just piling up in her body and now it’s exploding out, yesterday we took her to the doctor and were told she has bronchitis, an ear infection and RSV. Tiny little bodies shouldn’t have to hold so much sick.

Monday and Tuesday she had a bad cough, it sounded mucous-y so I medicated appropriately. Then Wednesday morning she was a bit warm, not feverish but warm so I gave her Tylenol. Wednesday after work I took her to mom’s house for a visit. She was still coughing every now and then and had a runny nose but I figured it was just a cold. Around 1:30 Wednesday night Laine woke up crying for me and when I went to go get her she was burning up with a fever, a very high scary fever. So I gave her some Tylenol and she and I took a cool shower. I kept her in just her diaper and let her lay in bed with me for a while. Laying out from under the covers under the fan made her feel better, but after she fell asleep I’d try to cover her up and as soon as I would she’d wake up very angry and kick them off her again. She woke up about every hour to moan and cry for a bit then she’d drape herself over me and fall asleep again, then wake up and moan and toss herself over Erik’s legs than sleep again. Around 5:00 she finally settled into a deeper sleep and I got out of bed to call the nurse. Laine’s fever wasn’t going down any and the Tylenol/ibuprofen wasn’t working and cool showers only worked until she dried off so I was told to bring her in first thing. So I sent out a text message to my boss asking for the day off and sent a text to my mom letting her know what was up and waited around until I could leave for the doctor. Laine was up and at it by 7:00 but she was just so sick and weighed down that she wouldn’t walk on her own and if I sat her on the couch she would fall right over to laying down. It’s like she didn’t have the energy to lift her head. I convinced her to eat a little food before we left and since then except for a handful of bites of rice she hasn’t eaten anything at all. Not even bottles. Just water and juice. IT’s so scary to have everything you know about your kid just dump upside-down. Prior to this sickness I could always offer Laine a bottle and know that she’d take it and suck it down like it was her last meal on earth. But since yesterday if you offer her anything at all it’s big time “NO!’ before this sickness I could raspberry her tummy and be guaranteed a laugh but last night she looked at me like you would assume a perfect stranger would look at you if you did that to them in a mall parking lot right before they called the police. And before this sickness you would have to beg Laine for a kiss and hug and to tell you “Iyou” (that’s I love you) but all day yesterday in bed with her after the doctor, she’d raise up her head and say Iyou and kiss my face before laying down on my chest. Right on top of my chest that was holding the most painful breaking heart I’ve ever had. And I’ve have a few but that’s a different blog.

You Are Getting Very Sleepy... And You Want To Clean Your Room

Mom and Dad and I went to the movies a weekend or two ago and afterward they came into the house for a short visit. !!! I know right? I never let ANYONE in my house. I mean it’s Colleen and the maid. That’s it. My house is my business, my personal sanctuary, the only place I have that is all mine. And I let someone in! I’m crazy proud of myself.

I know my mom and dad shouldn’t count as people, I mean they are family and should be able to come and go as they please and if we were talking a day or two after the maid visits then yes I’d agree with you but this was like a whole week after Katia came and did her magic and my living room had vomited all over itself and when mom asked if they could come in for just a minute to get a glass of water I so almost said no, but who tells their mom that they can’t come in the house? Especially when their mom is my mom and my mom pays for more than half of my maid every month? So after the initial stomach jumping into my esophagus part I told her sure, come on in. and how happy was I that no lights were on? So happy! And the gates were up so there was only one path strait to the living room which Erik had made a valiant effort to clean before we got home. They sat and talked and watched a little Mythbusters and drank some water and left and the whole time I couldn’t sit still with the picking up of all the things that had been sitting so quietly before I left for the movie and that were now screaming “Hey Nanny look at me, I’m right here where I’m not supposed to be!!” Stupid stupid empty milk glasses on the table and stupid stupid candy wrapper on the floor. UGH! How is it that a mom can turn an almost 30 year old into a 15 year old and not even know or try to do it.

I hope I have this power over Laine one day. It’ll only be fair.

I have the Mommy spit but I want the Mommy mind control too.

Moving Pictures

It’s tomorrow and here are your videos.  The first one is on Laine using Daddy as her own personal bouncy thing. Erik’s leg was sore for a good while after this, but you know, hey at least he got a work out right? And anyway, with her laughing like that he wouldn’t have stopped even if his leg fell off.

This next video is what Erik calls the worst mistake ever. Since Erik first let Laine dance on the ceiling he’s been regretting it. It’s fun to see her so entertained by something so simple but I’m not sure how much longer Erik can keep her lifter above his head. As of two days ago he wakes up with sore shoulders from it. But again, 1)it’s a work out he needs and 2)Laine is happy. That’s all that matters.

Update and Stuff

Alright! Jeez! I’m here. Man you people are demanding.
Laine and I were waiting for the windows to defog and she was sitting there so quietly that I knew something was going on so before I even turned around I grabbed my camera, hoping for a cute thumb sucking photo but instead I go her teaching her baby to blow kisses.


Mmmmwah!!



And after that first flash of the camera she picked her baby up and pointed at me and said “No no mommy!” Ha! So I can take all the pictures I want of her and she never gets aggravated but one flash at the baby and I get this.

No No, Mommy, You've already ruined my retnas I won't let you kill my baby's eyes too.

We took Laine to Ren Faire for the second time two weekends ago and she was totally into watching all the costumes. Erik shared his turkey leg with her and I know it looks like a eww face but it’s not.

It's a “let go of the meat you stupid leg!”face.

Bonus cheese...

The next picture was taken for Uncle James. If you don’t know the story here’s the nut version. James went to Denmark when he was a kid and sat on the stone lion in the royal throne room and almost got shot. Or something. It’s supposed to be funny but I wasn’t there so whatever.

She will be tryign to ride Bear now, watch out Nanny.

We took Laine to the petting zoo right about the time that we were getting aggravated that there were no toddler attractions, and then we finally got to that corner of the grounds and were all, “Yay!” Laine really enjoyed the petting zoo, she especially loved the donkey.



Oh My God Becky...



He was her friend.

See?!?!  (I like bug butts...)

Since we didn’t leave the house for Faire until after her nap we only got about three hours to walk around before it started getting chilly outside but it really ended up being perfect timing. We got home around seven and Laine was bathed and ready for bed before her normal bedtime so we stayed on schedule. Stayign on schedule makes Mommy very happy.

My baby looking like a big girl, not so much.



Big girls eating their vegetables does though.

For the most part we’ve taken it really easy the last few weekends. Hanging out at the house and watching a lot of TV. Laine and I have been watching a lot of concerts on Netflix. WE were watching Ozzfest and a button on the remote got pushed right when I was taking a picture of Laine’s curly hair and she turned just in time for the flash. Cutey patootie.

What happened to Anthrax??!

Comeback tomorrow for videos. Maybe.

lé sigh...

I’ve started reading again. Nothing cerebral, mostly romance (der) and science fiction and science fiction romance (my favorite). I haven’t read anything in about three months and it’s been a long time it seems since I’ve been able to finish a book; I have three half-read books on my bathroom sink that are getting warped from the water splashing when Laine brushes her teeth. I don’t necessarily care that I’ll probably never finish reading those books and that bugs the crap out of me. I used to read intellectually stimulating things, I read classics and mysteries and biographies and things that would stretch my mind and teach my something but for the last few years I haven’t read one book that didn’t have a shirtless man on the front cover. I’m not really complaining about it I don’t think, I’m just a little worried that I’ve lost my drive to learn and grow. I mean I care that the things I read are fluff but I don't care enough to change it up. I also don’t have the time to sit and be engrossed in a story. Part of my issue is I need to be able to put what I’m doing do with no time to fold down a page corner or place a bookmark. The things I read now it really doesn’t matter if I know my place or not, one page is pretty much the same as the next. All heaving and throbbing and ‘can’t tell where he ends and I begin’ and ‘my lady your ankle is showing’ and ‘no matter what we’ll always be together’.
I’m not going to change it I guess, but I wouldn’t mind mixing it up. Like maybe a historical romance.

Shopping Lists

I’ve started a new diet-y thing. It’s not so much what I can and cannot eat. I’ve been doing my math and for my body type it seems there are foods that I can eat and still lose weight and foods that hold onto my inches and pounds like a lifeline, so those foods have to be cut out (i.e.; peanut butter, apples, and cheese). I’ve also figured out my caloric intake versus my weight/inch loss and I’m on a limit. That’s the easy part. Limiting how much I eat has never been my problem; it’s been eating the right things. So anyway, now you know. It’s not what I eat its how much of it I eat, come back in 45 days (that’s December 23) and my tests will be over and I’ll let you know how it went.


Today I made up a list for Laine’s Christmas and Birthday gift that Erik and I would love to see her have. Most all of the gifts are specifically wanted. Like the bowling pins. Laine’ throws things so often, usually at Mommy’s head that I would like to give her something to throw with purpose and we can work on her accuracy in the process. The vacuum would be nice to teach her that it’s nothing to be afraid of and that the she can do it to while I vacuum the living room. Some of course look like something that she’d enjoy and I never want her to lack joy. Erik and I will be shopping off of this list as well but there is a lot there and all of it is from Target (see the two links, they are to the same products) so it’s easy to shop online or at the store. This year has been tough on everyone and I’ve been feeling guilty when people ask me what they should get Laine for Christmas or her birthday this year so I made this list, where there are no toys that are over $30. Hopefully it answers some questions or gives some ideas. Of course you can feel free to shop off list too. I’d never want to dictate something like this, I’m just trying to help out.

Erik on the other hand is a completely different issue. Don’t ask me about him because I have no clue. None. I may be asking you for ideas.

Amazingness All Around Except For That One Part At The End

I made a Christmas list. Look at it, its fancy and tech savvy and I’m so impressed with myself. The only thing was though that it only allows you to put ten items on that, so instead of making more than one wish list carousel I limited myself to only wanting ten things. For myself. I have other carousels for other people.
When I’m asked what I want for my birthday or Christmas and I usually say I don’t know it’s because I genuinely don’t know what I’d want. For the life of me I usually can’t think of anything that I’d want someone spending their money on for me. However if I’m told I can only want ten things and that even though normally I can’t think of even one thing now even if I can think of a million I have to limit myself to only ten things… well then, that’s a different story all together. All of a sudden it’s like, “NO THERE’S A MILLION THINGS I NEEEEED RIGHT NOW!!!”I’m insane. No like seriously. I had a great wish list made up and posted on here and in the process of writing this short little blog I’ve already made changes. And I have a list here on my desk of other changes. How is it that there are so many things that I want today and two weeks ago when Erik was having so much trouble shopping for my birthday I couldn’t even make up something that I wanted. What gives?!

Okay different topic. Laine’s been learning a ton of stuff at day care lately. She’s recently been moved to the 2 and 3 class. She’s young for it but they said that she plays better with the older kids than with the younger ones and that she pays attention when they are teaching their lessons so they don’t see a reason why Laine shouldn’t be moved. I don’t either. Especially when she comes home being able to tell me what 1 through 5 is on her fingers and she can say the words yellow and blue and point out things that are those colors. We had a ton of fun at the grocery store; I went around and would pick up two of the same thing but different brands or flavors and ask her “Green or Orange?” and she’d point and say which one she wanted. I ended up getting a few things I wouldn’t normally buy, like a yellow bell pepper, because SHE SAID YELLOW! And she didn’t even say lellow or lemellow or anything silly, she said yellow. She’s amazing.
She’s talking in mostly full sentences sometimes too. Yesterday she told me that she wanted to read a book. This morning she said she couldn’t see pawpaw (see the video). Granted it’s baby talk and it’s a special language sometimes that you must be fluent in to understand but that is so way beside the point. My little baby is talking. Crazy mazy fo shazy. I’m sayin’.


Also. Today is Thursday.

The Officially Unnamable Peoples Republic of Watching Bad TV Club Night and my person is sick.

Boo.

Laine Loves Pawpaw

List

While I was sick last month I had to make Erik a list for how to care for Laine and the house. He totally didn't follow that list, like, not even a little bit but that’s okay. He does his own thing. Except for when he’d say, “Hey babe, how come all my socks are dirty?” I’d say, “Well, sugar dumpling, because you didn’t do #14.” Then I’d pass out again. Okay no not really. My list back then was very short and very limited to what I could make myself care about enough to remind him to do and it wasn’t much. Anyway, over the last month I’ve adjusted that list and added things and now it’s a play by play for my daily routine.

I like having a list, if you know me you know that. I like the feeling of marking things off a list. Done! You’re done, I’m not doing you again today! There is a feeling of victory in crossing a word off a list. I know why serial killers keep lists of their victims. It’s the same way I am about laundry and dishes. I will annihilate them and then cross them off my list. Ah aha!!

Last night Erik came home a little early and caught me around number 11 which is Laine’s bath time, so he took care of it for me, as well as 11a-c, 12a-c and 13a. I got 13b. He found me marking things off and asked what I was doing , I told him it was my list, and I’m crossing things off. He looked at me and then the list and gave me a look that I can only describe as “whaaaa!?” I think he was a little jealous. My list is so much better than his list.

Morph

So I went to MorphThing.com to do some morphing of me and Erik to see if I could get Laine and no matter what combination I put in or how many times I made it mix us up I never once got a Laine. Boo.

The Laine Show

Dancing, Diapers and Denny's

Can You Say...

Back Roads

I may have mentioned on here that I have more than one way to drive to work. I have three different ways I can go and each has its pro’s and con’s.

I can take the Beltway and 288 but that way is expensive, three dollars a day plus it uses up more gas. However it shaves almost fifteen minutes off my drive, sometimes up to a half hour depending on traffic.
I can take 518 all the way in and that is my typical way going in the mornings, now that the school year is up and running again I have to deal with about six school zones but I really don’t mind that much. It’s still an easy ride.
I can also take the county roads into work, it’s a back, and round about way that takes the longest but uses the least amount of gas. Weird, that. Usually though I don’t’ go this way since it does take a full hour and I’m almost always running late.
Anyway, I took the long way this morning. Like I said, it’s rare for me to go this way especially at the end of the week when I’m done with going to work everyday and I resent the drive no matter what road I’m on. Usually I want to take the fastest way possible to get the day started and on its way to over quick. But last night was a hard night for me and the last thing I wanted today was to deal with rushed freeway traffic. I didn’t care to deal with angry mom’s trying to get into their schools and cutting people off just to get one more car length ahead, or speeding through red lights and seriously ladies?? You really aren’t getting there any quicker than you would had you not been an asshat. So when I got to Dixie Farm I’d decided to take the two lane back roads and just roll my windows down and turn my radio up and enjoy the county ride. I’ve got to say, I’ve been missing out. I haven’t been appreciating the beautiful ride I could be having every day. I just never take the time to look around at what I’m passing. I’m so concerned with the people around me and how fast we’re going that I’ve never really enjoyed the drive. Today I did though and I took pictures. This was my ride today and it’ll be the ride home too.

That's the sunrise over a feild through my window at 50mph.
Not too bad for a camera phone



Ahh, county roads and chemical tankers.



Ugh and TGI...wtF

So last night Laine woke up a lot. I was awake from about 12:30 until 4:00 before finally Erik got up and took her for me. I even drove her around for a solid hour from two to three. I went up 518 to 528 to 45 back to 518 and she was still singing in the back seat so I drove down 518 into League City up to El Camino back to 528 back down to 518 where she finally started snoring. I got her back into the house and into her crib just fine, but the second I laid down in bed, like, I hadn’t even pulled the covers over me and she woke up again, so I went back to her room and rocked her until she fell asleep again and crawled back into bed at 3:40 she woke up again at 4:00 and that’s when I make Erik get up and get her. So I got a half hour sleep before she woke up the first time and hour after Erik took her. I’m running on an hour and a half sleep, and I feel every minute missed. Why is she having so much trouble sleeping lately, I don’t’ understand it. There has to be something that is wrong I just can’t figure it out.

But this is just becoming an every day thing now and there are only so many times I can complain about this before I start to get annoyed with myself, but I will say this, seeing that Spain is having a siesta contest makes me so jealous, I’d totally win gold at that.

Dabbadabba

Sweet baby Jesus reads my blog. I talked to mom last night and she did her prayer whammy on Laine and Laine slept all night long. Hallelujah.
Last night after I picked up Laine from daycare we headed over to mom’s house, she wasn’t back from her rollerblading yet so Laine and I hung out reading books and eating some dinner. About half way though Laine’s oatmeal my mom came home. We updated photos and took a new “after” photo for mom’s diet website then around 8:00 we headed home. Laine didn’t fall asleep in the car like she normally does so I was a little worried, Nanny prayed over her before we left, Team God is supposed to be on this already, but once she was home she took her bottle and went right out no problem and so did I. I was asleep by 9:00 and didn’t get woken up even once, not even when Erik came to bed and that man has no sense of silence around sleepers. So I must have been out of it. If Laine wasn’t still in the same diaper I’d put her down in then I would be wondering if she did get up and Erik took care of her and I just didn’t hear it. But I don’t think that happened. I hope that didn’t happen. Bees. Because when a baby wakes up in the middle of the night the first thing you do is change her diaper right? Erik knows that, I’m pretty sure. Sheesh, now he’s not picking up his phone.
So this morning I woke up after a blissful eight hours of sleep and was able to do some laundry and take a shower before Laine started calling for me. She was in a great mood this morning, dancing and laughing all over the house, she made it easy to get out the door today. In the car she started talking to me. Just jabbering and pointing out the window and I guess telling me stuff about what she was seeing. I took my camera out and video taped it even though it was dark out and you can’t see anything, I got her voice and it’s like music. I keep listening to it over and over.

I’m probably going to give this girl some kind of complex, she’s going to grow up thinking she’s the most beautiful smartest most wonderful person in the world then she’s going to go to kindergarten.

Sleeeep, Neeeed Sleeeep

Laine has stopped sleeping throughout the night since we both got sick about three weeks ago; she started waking up around midnight every night. I try to get to bed as close to 8:00 as I can because I know I’m the one that’ll be getting up with her, and it’s not like she stays up that long but she sleeps super fitfully so I put her in bed with us so that she’ll stay asleep but in doing so I can’t sleep. Because Erik is always trying to roll over her or kick her or throw his pillow on her or turn his head just so he’s snoring the loudest he’s ever snored in his life right in her ear. So I constantly have to swat him away or halt his roll with a linebacker shoulder to the ribs.
Laine sleeps well in bed with us and I’d like for that to be all that matters but I haven’t gotten a solid night’s sleep in a couple of weeks now and I’m about at my wits end. If she were awake and needing attention that would be a completely different issue, but she’s asleep, just not deep asleep; any little thing will make her start crying so I need to be that protective barrier around her and protective barriers don’t sleep, so I don’t asleep.
I’ve tried to hold her until she falls asleep then take her back to her room, but she just wakes up an hour later again, I’ve tried taking her to the blue room so that we could spread out and sleep but she wakes up asking for daddy. I’ve tried putting her on my side of the bed and sleeping on the couch but she wakes up asking for me. I don’t know what to do. I’m completely at a loss.
Erik told me that if she wakes up tonight that I’m supposed to make him get her, which would be a wonderful thing if he actually would get up and get her. Because he can get her out and down for the whole night no problem. It’s the getting him awake and up to get her that’s the problem. I’ll shake him and say, go get Laine and he’ll go get her and bring her to me and put her in my arms, lay back down and go back to sleep. I’ll tell him to go put Laine back to sleep and he’ll go get her and bring her to me and put her in my arms and go back to sleep. I’ll tell him go get Laine and rock her until she’s asleep and he’ll get her and bring her to me. Yeah, as much as he’s a helpful dad when he’s awake he’s totally useless to me at night. He turns retarded as soon as his eyes shut and no amount of harping or whining or begging makes a difference.
So I’ve made up my mind that if tonight Laine wakes up I will be waking Erik up, walking him into the nursery, picking up Laine and putting her in his arms and sitting him down in the rocking chair. Then I will go back to bed and go to sleep. Or at least I’ll go back to bed and lay there awake until Erik comes back to bed with Laine sleeping in her crib because that’s how my mind rolls. I can’t sleep as long as there is a chance he or she will need me.
What if a bee files into Erik’s mouth and stings his throat and he can’t call me for help and he doesn’t want to move because there are more bees that might sting Laine and the only hint that anything is wrong is the way he’s breathing. If I don’t pay attention through the monitor I could miss that and I don’t know if Laine’s allergic to bees. She could die.
That’s why I always get her at night. So she won’t die.

Beautiful Morning