So I went to MorphThing.com to do some morphing of me and Erik to see if I could get Laine and no matter what combination I put in or how many times I made it mix us up I never once got a Laine. Boo. 
Wednesday, October 20
Morph
So I went to MorphThing.com to do some morphing of me and Erik to see if I could get Laine and no matter what combination I put in or how many times I made it mix us up I never once got a Laine. Boo. 
Tuesday, October 19
Monday, October 18
Friday, October 15
Back Roads
I may have mentioned on here that I have more than one way to drive to work. I have three different ways I can go and each has its pro’s and con’s.
I can take the Beltway and 288 but that way is expensive, three dollars a day plus it uses up more gas. However it shaves almost fifteen minutes off my drive, sometimes up to a half hour depending on traffic.
I can take 518 all the way in and that is my typical way going in the mornings, now that the school year is up and running again I have to deal with about six school zones but I really don’t mind that much. It’s still an easy ride.
I can also take the county roads into work, it’s a back, and round about way that takes the longest but uses the least amount of gas. Weird, that. Usually though I don’t’ go this way since it does take a full hour and I’m almost always running late.
Anyway, I took the long way this morning. Like I said, it’s rare for me to go this way especially at the end of the week when I’m done with going to work everyday and I resent the drive no matter what road I’m on. Usually I want to take the fastest way possible to get the day started and on its way to over quick. But last night was a hard night for me and the last thing I wanted today was to deal with rushed freeway traffic. I didn’t care to deal with angry mom’s trying to get into their schools and cutting people off just to get one more car length ahead, or speeding through red lights and seriously ladies?? You really aren’t getting there any quicker than you would had you not been an asshat. So when I got to Dixie Farm I’d decided to take the two lane back roads and just roll my windows down and turn my radio up and enjoy the county ride. I’ve got to say, I’ve been missing out. I haven’t been appreciating the beautiful ride I could be having every day. I just never take the time to look around at what I’m passing. I’m so concerned with the people around me and how fast we’re going that I’ve never really enjoyed the drive. Today I did though and I took pictures. This was my ride today and it’ll be the ride home too.
I can take the Beltway and 288 but that way is expensive, three dollars a day plus it uses up more gas. However it shaves almost fifteen minutes off my drive, sometimes up to a half hour depending on traffic.
I can take 518 all the way in and that is my typical way going in the mornings, now that the school year is up and running again I have to deal with about six school zones but I really don’t mind that much. It’s still an easy ride.
I can also take the county roads into work, it’s a back, and round about way that takes the longest but uses the least amount of gas. Weird, that. Usually though I don’t’ go this way since it does take a full hour and I’m almost always running late.
Anyway, I took the long way this morning. Like I said, it’s rare for me to go this way especially at the end of the week when I’m done with going to work everyday and I resent the drive no matter what road I’m on. Usually I want to take the fastest way possible to get the day started and on its way to over quick. But last night was a hard night for me and the last thing I wanted today was to deal with rushed freeway traffic. I didn’t care to deal with angry mom’s trying to get into their schools and cutting people off just to get one more car length ahead, or speeding through red lights and seriously ladies?? You really aren’t getting there any quicker than you would had you not been an asshat. So when I got to Dixie Farm I’d decided to take the two lane back roads and just roll my windows down and turn my radio up and enjoy the county ride. I’ve got to say, I’ve been missing out. I haven’t been appreciating the beautiful ride I could be having every day. I just never take the time to look around at what I’m passing. I’m so concerned with the people around me and how fast we’re going that I’ve never really enjoyed the drive. Today I did though and I took pictures. This was my ride today and it’ll be the ride home too.
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| That's the sunrise over a feild through my window at 50mph. Not too bad for a camera phone |
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| Ahh, county roads and chemical tankers. |
Ugh and TGI...wtF
So last night Laine woke up a lot. I was awake from about 12:30 until 4:00 before finally Erik got up and took her for me. I even drove her around for a solid hour from two to three. I went up 518 to 528 to 45 back to 518 and she was still singing in the back seat so I drove down 518 into League City up to El Camino back to 528 back down to 518 where she finally started snoring. I got her back into the house and into her crib just fine, but the second I laid down in bed, like, I hadn’t even pulled the covers over me and she woke up again, so I went back to her room and rocked her until she fell asleep again and crawled back into bed at 3:40 she woke up again at 4:00 and that’s when I make Erik get up and get her. So I got a half hour sleep before she woke up the first time and hour after Erik took her. I’m running on an hour and a half sleep, and I feel every minute missed. Why is she having so much trouble sleeping lately, I don’t’ understand it. There has to be something that is wrong I just can’t figure it out.
But this is just becoming an every day thing now and there are only so many times I can complain about this before I start to get annoyed with myself, but I will say this, seeing that Spain is having a siesta contest makes me so jealous, I’d totally win gold at that.
Wednesday, October 13
Dabbadabba
Sweet baby Jesus reads my blog. I talked to mom last night and she did her prayer whammy on Laine and Laine slept all night long. Hallelujah.
Last night after I picked up Laine from daycare we headed over to mom’s house, she wasn’t back from her rollerblading yet so Laine and I hung out reading books and eating some dinner. About half way though Laine’s oatmeal my mom came home. We updated photos and took a new “after” photo for mom’s diet website then around 8:00 we headed home. Laine didn’t fall asleep in the car like she normally does so I was a little worried, Nanny prayed over her before we left, Team God is supposed to be on this already, but once she was home she took her bottle and went right out no problem and so did I. I was asleep by 9:00 and didn’t get woken up even once, not even when Erik came to bed and that man has no sense of silence around sleepers. So I must have been out of it. If Laine wasn’t still in the same diaper I’d put her down in then I would be wondering if she did get up and Erik took care of her and I just didn’t hear it. But I don’t think that happened. I hope that didn’t happen. Bees. Because when a baby wakes up in the middle of the night the first thing you do is change her diaper right? Erik knows that, I’m pretty sure. Sheesh, now he’s not picking up his phone.
So this morning I woke up after a blissful eight hours of sleep and was able to do some laundry and take a shower before Laine started calling for me. She was in a great mood this morning, dancing and laughing all over the house, she made it easy to get out the door today. In the car she started talking to me. Just jabbering and pointing out the window and I guess telling me stuff about what she was seeing. I took my camera out and video taped it even though it was dark out and you can’t see anything, I got her voice and it’s like music. I keep listening to it over and over.
I’m probably going to give this girl some kind of complex, she’s going to grow up thinking she’s the most beautiful smartest most wonderful person in the world then she’s going to go to kindergarten.
Last night after I picked up Laine from daycare we headed over to mom’s house, she wasn’t back from her rollerblading yet so Laine and I hung out reading books and eating some dinner. About half way though Laine’s oatmeal my mom came home. We updated photos and took a new “after” photo for mom’s diet website then around 8:00 we headed home. Laine didn’t fall asleep in the car like she normally does so I was a little worried, Nanny prayed over her before we left, Team God is supposed to be on this already, but once she was home she took her bottle and went right out no problem and so did I. I was asleep by 9:00 and didn’t get woken up even once, not even when Erik came to bed and that man has no sense of silence around sleepers. So I must have been out of it. If Laine wasn’t still in the same diaper I’d put her down in then I would be wondering if she did get up and Erik took care of her and I just didn’t hear it. But I don’t think that happened. I hope that didn’t happen. Bees. Because when a baby wakes up in the middle of the night the first thing you do is change her diaper right? Erik knows that, I’m pretty sure. Sheesh, now he’s not picking up his phone.
So this morning I woke up after a blissful eight hours of sleep and was able to do some laundry and take a shower before Laine started calling for me. She was in a great mood this morning, dancing and laughing all over the house, she made it easy to get out the door today. In the car she started talking to me. Just jabbering and pointing out the window and I guess telling me stuff about what she was seeing. I took my camera out and video taped it even though it was dark out and you can’t see anything, I got her voice and it’s like music. I keep listening to it over and over.
I’m probably going to give this girl some kind of complex, she’s going to grow up thinking she’s the most beautiful smartest most wonderful person in the world then she’s going to go to kindergarten.
Tuesday, October 12
Sleeeep, Neeeed Sleeeep
Laine has stopped sleeping throughout the night since we both got sick about three weeks ago; she started waking up around midnight every night. I try to get to bed as close to 8:00 as I can because I know I’m the one that’ll be getting up with her, and it’s not like she stays up that long but she sleeps super fitfully so I put her in bed with us so that she’ll stay asleep but in doing so I can’t sleep. Because Erik is always trying to roll over her or kick her or throw his pillow on her or turn his head just so he’s snoring the loudest he’s ever snored in his life right in her ear. So I constantly have to swat him away or halt his roll with a linebacker shoulder to the ribs.
Laine sleeps well in bed with us and I’d like for that to be all that matters but I haven’t gotten a solid night’s sleep in a couple of weeks now and I’m about at my wits end. If she were awake and needing attention that would be a completely different issue, but she’s asleep, just not deep asleep; any little thing will make her start crying so I need to be that protective barrier around her and protective barriers don’t sleep, so I don’t asleep.
I’ve tried to hold her until she falls asleep then take her back to her room, but she just wakes up an hour later again, I’ve tried taking her to the blue room so that we could spread out and sleep but she wakes up asking for daddy. I’ve tried putting her on my side of the bed and sleeping on the couch but she wakes up asking for me. I don’t know what to do. I’m completely at a loss.
Erik told me that if she wakes up tonight that I’m supposed to make him get her, which would be a wonderful thing if he actually would get up and get her. Because he can get her out and down for the whole night no problem. It’s the getting him awake and up to get her that’s the problem. I’ll shake him and say, go get Laine and he’ll go get her and bring her to me and put her in my arms, lay back down and go back to sleep. I’ll tell him to go put Laine back to sleep and he’ll go get her and bring her to me and put her in my arms and go back to sleep. I’ll tell him go get Laine and rock her until she’s asleep and he’ll get her and bring her to me. Yeah, as much as he’s a helpful dad when he’s awake he’s totally useless to me at night. He turns retarded as soon as his eyes shut and no amount of harping or whining or begging makes a difference.
So I’ve made up my mind that if tonight Laine wakes up I will be waking Erik up, walking him into the nursery, picking up Laine and putting her in his arms and sitting him down in the rocking chair. Then I will go back to bed and go to sleep. Or at least I’ll go back to bed and lay there awake until Erik comes back to bed with Laine sleeping in her crib because that’s how my mind rolls. I can’t sleep as long as there is a chance he or she will need me.
What if a bee files into Erik’s mouth and stings his throat and he can’t call me for help and he doesn’t want to move because there are more bees that might sting Laine and the only hint that anything is wrong is the way he’s breathing. If I don’t pay attention through the monitor I could miss that and I don’t know if Laine’s allergic to bees. She could die.
That’s why I always get her at night. So she won’t die.
Laine sleeps well in bed with us and I’d like for that to be all that matters but I haven’t gotten a solid night’s sleep in a couple of weeks now and I’m about at my wits end. If she were awake and needing attention that would be a completely different issue, but she’s asleep, just not deep asleep; any little thing will make her start crying so I need to be that protective barrier around her and protective barriers don’t sleep, so I don’t asleep.
I’ve tried to hold her until she falls asleep then take her back to her room, but she just wakes up an hour later again, I’ve tried taking her to the blue room so that we could spread out and sleep but she wakes up asking for daddy. I’ve tried putting her on my side of the bed and sleeping on the couch but she wakes up asking for me. I don’t know what to do. I’m completely at a loss.
Erik told me that if she wakes up tonight that I’m supposed to make him get her, which would be a wonderful thing if he actually would get up and get her. Because he can get her out and down for the whole night no problem. It’s the getting him awake and up to get her that’s the problem. I’ll shake him and say, go get Laine and he’ll go get her and bring her to me and put her in my arms, lay back down and go back to sleep. I’ll tell him to go put Laine back to sleep and he’ll go get her and bring her to me and put her in my arms and go back to sleep. I’ll tell him go get Laine and rock her until she’s asleep and he’ll get her and bring her to me. Yeah, as much as he’s a helpful dad when he’s awake he’s totally useless to me at night. He turns retarded as soon as his eyes shut and no amount of harping or whining or begging makes a difference.
So I’ve made up my mind that if tonight Laine wakes up I will be waking Erik up, walking him into the nursery, picking up Laine and putting her in his arms and sitting him down in the rocking chair. Then I will go back to bed and go to sleep. Or at least I’ll go back to bed and lay there awake until Erik comes back to bed with Laine sleeping in her crib because that’s how my mind rolls. I can’t sleep as long as there is a chance he or she will need me.
What if a bee files into Erik’s mouth and stings his throat and he can’t call me for help and he doesn’t want to move because there are more bees that might sting Laine and the only hint that anything is wrong is the way he’s breathing. If I don’t pay attention through the monitor I could miss that and I don’t know if Laine’s allergic to bees. She could die.
That’s why I always get her at night. So she won’t die.
Monday, October 11
Lost and Found
I was looking for clothes to take to a resale store to get a little cash for Christmas shopping this weekend and I found a box in my closet that’s been there since we moved in to this house; it started out with only the yarn I got from my grandma after she died that I used most of it to make a blanket that we use at the park or Jacob and Josh’s soccer games but I’ve got a ball or two left and I’m not sure exactly what to make now if anything but I can’t throw them away so in the box they go, and lots of stuff have gotten tossed into the box over the years, things that don’t fit or don’t get used anymore but things that I don’t want to throw away. It’s not too bad considering it’s only the one box. So yesterday I’m going through my hanging clothes and finding close to nothing that anyone would pay for and then I see the box and there are some jeans on top so I’m going through those and thinking hey why not humiliate myself in the privacy of my own room, no one else will see me cry and so I tried on these jeans. Just to force myself to throw them out you know, because this one last time if they don’t fit I’ll get rid of them, I need the cash.
Before I get to that, how many of you are on a diet right now? How’s that working out for you? I remember the first diet I ever went on. I was a junior in high school and my mom wanted to try Sugar Busters and I decided to do it with her, more as a support system than anything, more to the point I can remember the last day of that diet I drove strait to Sonic and got a Rout 44 Strawberry Limeade. It was the most disgusting thing I’d ever tasted. But I finished it, because there is a fundamental objective to dieting and when you accomplish that goal you need to celebrate, I celebrated a few months of no sugar by drinking the equivalent of all I’d missed in one beverage. Anyhow, this new diet I’m on now, I’m not losing any weigh and I’m not really accomplishing any goals I’d set for myself, probably because they are all weight related, so about a week ago I quit weighing myself, just screw it. I’m making a change in my eating habits I’m not dieting anymore. And I’m not stressing the diet either, because it’s not a diet it’s a lifestyle. And if that lifestyle includes a slice of pizza here and there or cream in my coffee so be it. So yeah, all of that and now back to the jeans in my closet. They are 32’s from four years ago when I first started working at my job with Adam. I haven’t been able to wear them since before I was thinking about getting pregnant with Laine. I stuck one leg in, expecting to get it hung up on my fat flabby knees but it went up and over, so I stuck the other leg in and wiggled and jumped and tah-dah, I pulled them up and over my ass and buttoned them and everything. Amazing! Angels singing! I took pictures, I strutted down the hall, I did a squat or two, and I haven’t taken them off for three days.
Back to the box though, beneath those jeans were old bathing suits (that do not fit over my fat flabby behind) and near the bottom, not folded so it must have accidentally fallen in was one of my grandpa’s cardigan sweaters. I had just talked to my mom the other day about how I had two of his sweaters that I just didn’t know where they were. I found one the day before in the entry way closet and I took it out to try it on and a button fell off and made me cry so I’m not sure why I was surprised when I pulled out this other sweater that it put me on my ass. My fingers grazed it and I felt that material and I knew exactly what it was and instead of snatching it up I pulled the box out into the center of the closet and I peeled everything else away from it until that sweater was the only thing on top and I had to sit down because I could smell it. It didn’t smell completely like Pawpaw but it was close enough and I sat and I cried and I missed my grandpa like I haven’t missed him in years. I’m wearing his cardigan now. It’s a little itchy and surprisingly a little small for me. I never thought of myself as larger than my grandpa, he was huge, but that could have just been his character, he was a great big character. I’m sitting here in a giant mans small itchy sweater and I think about how I never wanted to take it off, that it is probably the most comfortable thing I’ve ever worn.
Before I get to that, how many of you are on a diet right now? How’s that working out for you? I remember the first diet I ever went on. I was a junior in high school and my mom wanted to try Sugar Busters and I decided to do it with her, more as a support system than anything, more to the point I can remember the last day of that diet I drove strait to Sonic and got a Rout 44 Strawberry Limeade. It was the most disgusting thing I’d ever tasted. But I finished it, because there is a fundamental objective to dieting and when you accomplish that goal you need to celebrate, I celebrated a few months of no sugar by drinking the equivalent of all I’d missed in one beverage. Anyhow, this new diet I’m on now, I’m not losing any weigh and I’m not really accomplishing any goals I’d set for myself, probably because they are all weight related, so about a week ago I quit weighing myself, just screw it. I’m making a change in my eating habits I’m not dieting anymore. And I’m not stressing the diet either, because it’s not a diet it’s a lifestyle. And if that lifestyle includes a slice of pizza here and there or cream in my coffee so be it. So yeah, all of that and now back to the jeans in my closet. They are 32’s from four years ago when I first started working at my job with Adam. I haven’t been able to wear them since before I was thinking about getting pregnant with Laine. I stuck one leg in, expecting to get it hung up on my fat flabby knees but it went up and over, so I stuck the other leg in and wiggled and jumped and tah-dah, I pulled them up and over my ass and buttoned them and everything. Amazing! Angels singing! I took pictures, I strutted down the hall, I did a squat or two, and I haven’t taken them off for three days.
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| Here’s a photo because it’s amazing. |
Friday, October 8
Thursday, October 7
Stars
Something cool happened this morning that will probably never happen again for as long as I live. I was fumbling with my phone in the car this morning (no, that will happen again) and I was trying to sort through the six phone numbers I have under Keith Porter in my phone to call Daddy and say Happy Birthday (in the most singsong-y annoying voice I could manage at 7:00) and I look up just as I’m pulling up to Dixie Farm and 518 and right there in the middle of the sky, bright as can be and quick as lightning, I saw a shooting star. I’d never seen one before and I bet I’ll never see another one again but the four cars ahead of me immediately slammed on their brakes, apparently they’d never seen one either and were going to, I don’t know, catch it? So I pressed the call button and told Daddy to make a wish, I’d just seen a shooting star for his birthday. That’s a pretty amazing thing I think. I’d take that as a birthday present even if it is just a flaming ball of galactic trash.
The rest of this blog has been written and deleted a couple of times now and each time I get closer to what I want to say but not exactly there. How do I say happy birthday to my daddy in a meaningful way while also conveying the importance of him and his love of me to all of you. It’s hard. And you know me, anytime it’s someone’s special day I like to single them out, make them feel special, bring them to the center of attention, make them wear a sombrero and sing at them while taking photo’s to forever shame them, like you do. But Daddy’s a little more laid back now and it isn’t quite the ordeal it used to be to get him to wear a sombrero and he isn’t even going to be home tonight for me to take a new birthday video, I won’t see him for a day or two at most which is totally cool, he’s going hunting with coworkers and that sounds like he’s going to have fun and I’m happy for him. So I’m going to hold off talking about Daddy’s birthday until I get to spend some time with him first. Maybe Monday I’ll have something for you on that, maybe not. Maybe I’ll just keep it between me and Daddy. Maybe you’ll never know.
Wednesday, October 6
Rash
I forgot to update you all on Laine yesterday. Laine has had a rash for all of her nineteen months and we have been doing all we know how to do to get rid of it. Every time we visit the pediatrician they tell us to try a different lotion or cream. Last time our doctor told us that if this last kind didn’t work that we’d have to take her to a dermatologist. Well, about three weeks ago Laine started developing a new different rash on her stomach and in those three weeks its spread to her back and arms. Erik took her to the UTMB pediatric dermatologist on Monday and you know what he said it was? Scarlet Fever. Yeah.
Turns out she never had scarlet fever but the people around her that had Strep and bacterial infections the last month or so have been bombarding her little body with things it doesn’t know how to fight and while she didn’t get strep or scarlet fever per say her body developed the rash that usually comes with scarlet fever. We were told that had we brought Laine into the doctor they should have caught it right away, that it was obvious; that there was no way it could be confused with anything else. Needless to say we are changing doctors. The dermatologist gave us the name of yet another over the counter cream and in only two days her legs are remarkably better. It’s completely incomprehensible to me that our doctor could be so incompetent that she couldn’t fix this in the nineteen months she’s been treating Laine but one day with another doctor and it’s fixed. It’s ridiculous. To the max.
Turns out she never had scarlet fever but the people around her that had Strep and bacterial infections the last month or so have been bombarding her little body with things it doesn’t know how to fight and while she didn’t get strep or scarlet fever per say her body developed the rash that usually comes with scarlet fever. We were told that had we brought Laine into the doctor they should have caught it right away, that it was obvious; that there was no way it could be confused with anything else. Needless to say we are changing doctors. The dermatologist gave us the name of yet another over the counter cream and in only two days her legs are remarkably better. It’s completely incomprehensible to me that our doctor could be so incompetent that she couldn’t fix this in the nineteen months she’s been treating Laine but one day with another doctor and it’s fixed. It’s ridiculous. To the max.
Anyhow, we were told to leave the rash on her stomach alone and it should go away in a week or two on its own. So, that’s a relief. And now that finally she and I are both healthy again we can put all of this mess away.
Clarification::
We had already spoken to the pediatrician about all the rashes and the pediatrician was not helpful.
We took Laine into the dermatologist for all the rashes, the dermatologist was helpful.
The rash on her legs is the one she's had since she was born; that is the rash we were given the cream for and the rash that is clearing up.
The rash on her back and stomach is the new scarlet fever one that needs to be left alone.
Daddy's Day Is Coming!
My daddy’s birthday is tomorrow. I can’t help but think this year is flying by a little too fast. I mean I just posted a blog about Daddy’s birthday and the video... my goodness, Laine was so tiny! And it’s amazing how even more laid back with her Daddy’s gotten, a spoon in the face isn’t anything she could get away with now but “Pawpaw Pawpaw Pawpaw Pawpaw Pawpaw Pawpaw” is like music to him and that’s beyond me because “Daddy Daddy Daddy Daddy Daddy Daddy Daddy Daddy” would have gotten a “WHAT!?!” where as her Pawpaw’s get “yes ma’am’s” it’s flabbergasting and wonderful to see. I’ll try to write more about all that tomorrow or the next day, my goal will be to get good video of them together each year. I’d love to have more video of me and my Pawpaw.
Tuesday, October 5
Longest Blog EVAR!
Since I know that all of you are up to date on all my blogs I’m just going to assume that you all know and are appropriately feeling sorry for me and my achy head. You can go ahead and keep that sympathy for a little longer, I’m starting the recap on Friday and I don’t get fixed until Monday. So Friday, I was extra cranky at work, everyone noticed that I wasn’t feeling well and I don’t want to take credit where it isn’t due but since I’m pretty sure Jimbo let us all go early because of how pitiful I looked I’ll just go ahead and say your welcome now.
So I was on the road around 12:30 heading home. I got there and ate and sat on the couch debating on whether or not I should dye my hair. My roots are out a bit. but since I couldn’t see the point of making my head hurt even more from the fumes I decided against it. Instead I just laid on the couch for about an hour before my mom and grandma said they were ready for me to come over, so I picked up Laine and headed over there to visit for a while. Laine and I got in the pool for a bit but her fingers started turning purple so we got out and showered off. She got her pajama’s on and I got ready for the CPC thing. Erik called to tell me he was on his way home at 4:30 and we all felt a little rushed since we were supposed to be at the church at 5:30 and we still needed to drop Laine off with Torben and Kate. Once Erik came and picked us up we headed to his parents but neither one of them were home so we left Laine with Kate to babysit. Patricia was there by 6:30 and Kate is amazing about checking in and sending me photo’s often that I never really worry about Laine with her. Kate’s the best.
Once we got to the church in Pasadena I kept waiting for the butterflies and the nausea to settle in but it never did. I think listening to our CD from last year made me feel prepped for our time on stage. I also was able to watch the DVD I made for Jacob and was able to relive a lot of what I felt at the time of the adoption. But since I spoke about the adoption last a lot has changed about the way I feel. I’m not angry anymore and I rarely get sad. I’ve found my peace. So this time was a lot different than last time in that I didn’t run off the stage and vomit when we finished and I smiled a lot this time, my cheeks were hurting so I know I smiled a lot, and I had to say more than once that “If you listen to the CD you’ll hear me say differently” because I think I’ve done more growing up in my emotions where as in the last eight years I’ve just been growing out, letting the emotions I had just get larger and stagnant. A lot of my growth up had to do with the fact that I see Jacob on a regular basis now. That helps.
So I loaded up aine and gave my mom a few too few hugs and thankyou's, those never add up to the appropriate number where she’s concerned. Once I got home who’s there but Erik, asking what I needed help with so bad. How do you say “nothing now, I took care of it since you said you couldn’t come” without sounding like a bitch? I’ll tell you, you can’t. So Erik went back to the couch to watch TV and left me with a newly amped up kid to try and calm down and get into bed until well after midnight. But again, at least she slept all night and didn’t wake up until 7:30.
I’m debating starting a new blog here because I know it’s going to be another long one but since you’re here... we come to Monday, and before this Monday I had been seriously debating splitting my hate for Tuesday right down the middle with Mondays. But I met a man. A wonderfully wonderful man named Dr Hudson. Before I get to him though let me tell you, I thought maybe I’d made a mistake waiting until Monday to got to a new doctor. I had a whole list of ailments that you’d think I was about to burst in some insane viral epidemic, either that or that my head was going to explode all over my parents clean carpet. Either way I felt like I was seriously hurting myself by waiting until Monday when they could have taken me on Friday, but priorities, you know. It was more important to speak at CPC than it was for my head to stay in one piece.
So Monday morning I get up and stretch like usual but this morning my blood is pounding so hard in my ears that I literally cannot even stand up much less roll over into my side. So I laid there for upwards of an hour until Erik’s alarm went off and I had him help me to the shower. After that I felt a little better so I got Laine up and dressed for the day and Erik was up and dressed too and he took Laine to daycare, but guess what, we forgot her beebee again. It’s the tumor I tell you, otherwise I’d never forget that thing. So I got dressed and did a load of never ending laundry and headed out to drop off the beebee at the daycare, it was a little awkward making the new girl walk all the way across the building to get it from me and she was looking at me like a retard who is making her go out of her way for no reason but I explained to her that Laine was right on the other side of the window and I didn’t’ want her to see me and I apologies to her for inconveniencing her but by the time I was in my car I was ready to turn back around and give her what for, I mean what am I paying them for anyway. To take care of my kid while I can’t and that includes keeping her out of eyesight if it keeps her happy. Jeez.
Anyway, I then head out to Pearland for my appointment. I get there after a quick stop at Walgreens for a bottle of water and some altoids, yeah I forgot to brush my teeth before going someplace where there was a good possibility a doctor may want to look at my newly healed throat. And he did and I was glad I stopped first.
I got to the office and had to wait a while to get the paperwork to fill out as a new patient and my lord in heaven batman, if I knew my future grandchildren’s social security numbers they would have forced it out of me with bamboo under my nails, how the heck should I know when I got my chicken pox I was like four years old and how would I know if I was vaccinated for hep b when I was an infant? I was an infant. PFT! So I finish laboring my way through page after page of paperwork and hand it over to the nurse who holds my insurance card hostage until the nurse gives it back when I’m already in the exam room.
Are you noticing a pattern here, me making a huge deal and being greatly bothered by nothing? Yeah, that had been my life for like two weeks and I could see and hear myself being ridiculous and was powerless to stop it.
So I’m in the exam room and I’m getting weighed and my blood pressure and temp is taken. I weigh exactly the same as I did that morning at home (176) and my blood pressure was almost exactly what it was the other day at moms house (177/72) and my temp was exactly the same as the night before (95.7) which all three being the same is kind of weird right?
The nurse talked to me for almost a half an hour, asking me all kinds of questions and writing down all my answers I think verbatim because she filled out almost three sheets of paper. She was super attentive and incredibly intuitive. I liked her a lot, she didn’t’ smile too much and just did her job but in a nice lady kind of way and I like that. After she left it was only about two minutes before I met the most wonderful man in the whole world next to my dad, and my husband and my grandpa and my grandpa and my brother and my son and his brother but you get the point. Besides all the big greats he’s next. He’s a jolly man in a plaid shirt and suspenders. If you ever wondered what Saint Nic does on his time off, now you know. He’s my doctor. And he’s amazing. He talked to me for almost an hour and a half , just me and him. Even when the blood was being all CBC’d or whatever he sat next to me and had me walk him through the last three weeks, every drug I’d been put on and how they effected me, every day I spent laying down and resting versus the days I was up and active and how I felt each of those type of days versus the other. He asked me how long I’d been having allergy problems and I told him I hadn’t had allergies since last spring with I got house arrested by the pollen. But he kept on the allergy point, asking me why I was sniffing so often and I was all “I’m not sniffing, I don’t’ have a runny nose or anything, no itchy runny eyes, no sneezing no nothing” he just said okay and then kept talking about other tuff but pointing out each time I sniffed. I never realized how often I do that. It had made me thoroughly self conscious about it. So then he started asking me about my joints and had any of them become stiff or sore, I told him my shoulders and neck feel like they have a constant crick in them but I just figured it was from laying on the couch for so long and so often. He put his had on the back of my neck and started rotating my neck and the only pain I felt was a tightening in the center of the back of my neck and a pulling at my shoulders. He then asked me to sniff and I did then he pinched whatever muscle gets used while sniffing and I just about fell off my chair, I went all blurry eyed and I swear I almost screamed out loud. I’ve never felt the pain of giving birth through my neck before but now I have. He told me it hurts because I have a couple of pulled muscles and he thinks an pinched nerve too. I couldn’t believe it, I told him It didn’t’ feel pinched and pulled and I really don’t feel like I have allergies and I can’t believe that he’s getting all this from :I have a headache” and he just told me it was because I’m not a titty baby. Yeah, my amazing doctor broke it down to that simple fact and from that point on he started to seriously question me about my headache and how it hurt and where it hurt and how often and when it hurts worse and less because if I don’t’ even notice pinched nerves and pulled muscle but my headache was putting me on my ass he knew it must really hurt me.
I can’t even tell you, I still want to cry from the absolute happiness I felt just to have a doctor take me seriously. He talked to me and he logically walked through every problem I have and her treated each one with equal seriousness and all I can say is that I think I’m in love. I’ll never go to another doctor again if he’s this amazing every time.
Anyhow, my tumor turned out to be allergies. My glands are so swollen that they are putting pressure on all my next and shoulder muscles which paired with my sniffling is pulling and pinching at things it normally wouldn’t. And my swollen sinuses are what was making my head hurt worse that it already was from the tension headaches I’ve been getting from stress. This is the only thing I’m skeptical about . it went like this. Him: are you under an unusual about of stress? Me: no, not really. I have a 19 month old and a husband and a job and a home to care for and bills to pay just like every other married mother in the world, no more or less stress than anyone else. Him: well for some people that is too much stress. Me: not for me it isn’t. Him: for your body it might be.
He’s sharp he’s got wit and he’s quick with his comebacks and I think that might be why I take him at his word. So I can take Alive while I am on my meds but once I’m off them and if the headaches continue he told me to try tension headache medication instead of the migraine meds that weren’t helping much.
So I asked him about my meds, if I should just take Claritin or Benadryl for the allergies and he said we were way beyond that and he’s got me on some antibiotic that has like three warnings about the effects on my GI tract and some steroids that in the instructions it talks about how it’s used to treat liver disease, kidney disease, a thyroid disorder, a history of malaria, tuberculosis, osteoporosis, herpes infection of the eyes, stomach ulcers, ulcerative colitis, or diverticulitis, depression or mental illness, congestive heart failure, or high blood pressure. WTF?! I didn’t even know there was suck a thing as herpes of the eye. Anyhow that’s what I’m taking and so far so good. He gave me a shot in my butt too and within about six hours my headache was completely gone. It was the first night of total rest I’ve gotten in over three weeks. I can’t even put into words my bliss. It thought I could handle a little headache, a big headache and a migraine even but apparently eighteen days strait of no relief had done very bad things to me.
So today I’m awake and I have more energy that every day in the last three weeks combined and I am looking forward to going home tonight and finish cleaning my house that I started on last night. It was such an epiphany to finally have my head clear and be feeling no pain, it was like a veil was lifted and I could see the wreck my house was where before I didn’t’ care at all what was stuck in my carpet or what was hiding under Laine’s crib (three diapers ugh!) So I got he kitchen living room dining room Laine’s room and my room cleaned and ready for Katia to come on down!
So I was on the road around 12:30 heading home. I got there and ate and sat on the couch debating on whether or not I should dye my hair. My roots are out a bit. but since I couldn’t see the point of making my head hurt even more from the fumes I decided against it. Instead I just laid on the couch for about an hour before my mom and grandma said they were ready for me to come over, so I picked up Laine and headed over there to visit for a while. Laine and I got in the pool for a bit but her fingers started turning purple so we got out and showered off. She got her pajama’s on and I got ready for the CPC thing. Erik called to tell me he was on his way home at 4:30 and we all felt a little rushed since we were supposed to be at the church at 5:30 and we still needed to drop Laine off with Torben and Kate. Once Erik came and picked us up we headed to his parents but neither one of them were home so we left Laine with Kate to babysit. Patricia was there by 6:30 and Kate is amazing about checking in and sending me photo’s often that I never really worry about Laine with her. Kate’s the best.
Once we got to the church in Pasadena I kept waiting for the butterflies and the nausea to settle in but it never did. I think listening to our CD from last year made me feel prepped for our time on stage. I also was able to watch the DVD I made for Jacob and was able to relive a lot of what I felt at the time of the adoption. But since I spoke about the adoption last a lot has changed about the way I feel. I’m not angry anymore and I rarely get sad. I’ve found my peace. So this time was a lot different than last time in that I didn’t run off the stage and vomit when we finished and I smiled a lot this time, my cheeks were hurting so I know I smiled a lot, and I had to say more than once that “If you listen to the CD you’ll hear me say differently” because I think I’ve done more growing up in my emotions where as in the last eight years I’ve just been growing out, letting the emotions I had just get larger and stagnant. A lot of my growth up had to do with the fact that I see Jacob on a regular basis now. That helps.
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| Darren emcee'd for us so none of us had to think to hard about what to say next. |
After the thing at CPC Erik and I had a long talk in the car about how much had changed in the last 19 months, how I’ve changed a lot of who I am and what I feel since I had Laine. And he let me know that he is grateful to Laine because he sees less sadness in me since she came a long. I think Laine makes it possible for me to learn how to love as a mother and not a birth mother, a little more attached a little more intimate. Since Laine I’ve been too busy to think about things I’ve lost and now all I have is the happiness of seeing Jacob when I can and the joy I feel when I think of him. So yeah, I’m grateful for Laine too.
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| My Angel |
So, onward. We picked Laine up from the Rosendahl's and headed home for some much needed sleep but Laine woke up in the driveway so she and I got some quality time laying in bed just being quiet and listening to dad battle the squirrel in the attic until we both fell asleep.
Saturday morning and Erik is up and at it again with the squirrel this time he took the bb gun and did a great John Wayne for us. Long story short about the squirrel, he eventually got it out of the attic and the attic is now fully sealed at least temporarily, he’s going to be getting a lot more creative given the time to think about it. I texted dad soon after and asked him if we could ride with him to the family reunion and he said sure, be there in fifteen minutes. Eek! So Laine and I got up and showered and I got her bag packed and my dad was knocking on the door before I had any pants on. I only took an extra five or seven minutes but I hate to keep him waiting, I know I’m exactly like him when I want to be on the road and I know it would aggravate me to wait so I hurried as fast as I could and in the process of hurrying and getting out the door I forgot Laine’s beebee. It’s one of only two times I’ve ever done that. So I sent Erik a text telling him to bring it to the woodlands when he came. (oh yeah, he stayed behind to continue the battle with the squirrel until about twelve thirty, he showed up as Laine and I were napping). The whole time that Laine was up and moving around though she was stuck like glue to my dad. He's her best friend for sure.
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| I know it looks like she's in time out but she's not, I'm pretty sure she was just contemplating how to get down. |
So we got to the family reunion at I don’t’ know what time but it was early and I thought that’s why no one was there but it turns out that half the family just didn’t show up. Totally wacky. I can’t say I didn’t enjoy it though, it was kind of nice having the family in such a small group, I was able to talk to everyone there one on one and I can’t ever do that when everyone shows up. But even though it was nice this time, next time I’d still like to see everyone. (Elizabeth. I’m looking at you.)
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| My Peeps |
Once 5:30 or so rolled around Erik and I were close to the last to leave, we packed up the care and headed out with mom and dad just ahead of us. Laine was marvelous the whole ride home, she did a lot of singing and talking and screaming and she kept up entertained the whole way back. Since she was still awake when we got into league city we went ahead and stopped by Lowes to look at a new vanity for the downstairs bathroom and found one that we both thought was amazing. Yay for agreement with the spouse!
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| *Angels Singing* |
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| No we did not let her play with scissors. |
Anyway, we headed home and went on with our relaxing, we were so pooped, all we wanted to do as sleep but Laine wanted to stay up until after 11:00 but thankfully she slept for the rest of the night.
Sunday we woke up around 8:00 which is something we haven’t been about to do in a very long time but Laine and I were up and eating but my head hurt way too bad to try to wrestle Laine into the shower. So I gave Erik puppy dog eyes and he took her for me and I passed on a shower all together. Lunch was at the Schmales’s house this Sunday and boy am I glad I’d already slipped up on my diet because I would have slipped all over those sandwiches and soup. It was amazing. I was ready to go home and my mom offered to drive me since Erik was helping Ben with his computer but instead of going home we went to HEB because momma wanted to help me get started on my diet the right way. So she wouldn’t even let me go home to get my money she bought me almost $200 worth of groceries and then we went to her house until almost 8:00 and cooked until our feet fell off. Erik had been home all day cutting the tree in the back yard with Charles and by the time I was ready to go home and needed help getting all the TWO WEEKS WORTH OF FOOD in to the freezer as well as getting Laine to bed he was already gone to drop Charles off and wouldn’t’ be home to help me out at all. But mom offered to watch Laine as I did a quick freezer run and I’m glad because I was in and out of my trunk to the freezer at least six times. There’s no way Laine wouldn’t’ have been underfoot had I tried to do that on my own. I didn’t think I took more than fifteen minutes to unload it all but by the time I got back to my mom’s house she had already given Laine a bath and her kitchen, which we DESTROYED was already more that half cleaned up. That woman is a MACHINE.
I’m debating starting a new blog here because I know it’s going to be another long one but since you’re here... we come to Monday, and before this Monday I had been seriously debating splitting my hate for Tuesday right down the middle with Mondays. But I met a man. A wonderfully wonderful man named Dr Hudson. Before I get to him though let me tell you, I thought maybe I’d made a mistake waiting until Monday to got to a new doctor. I had a whole list of ailments that you’d think I was about to burst in some insane viral epidemic, either that or that my head was going to explode all over my parents clean carpet. Either way I felt like I was seriously hurting myself by waiting until Monday when they could have taken me on Friday, but priorities, you know. It was more important to speak at CPC than it was for my head to stay in one piece.
So Monday morning I get up and stretch like usual but this morning my blood is pounding so hard in my ears that I literally cannot even stand up much less roll over into my side. So I laid there for upwards of an hour until Erik’s alarm went off and I had him help me to the shower. After that I felt a little better so I got Laine up and dressed for the day and Erik was up and dressed too and he took Laine to daycare, but guess what, we forgot her beebee again. It’s the tumor I tell you, otherwise I’d never forget that thing. So I got dressed and did a load of never ending laundry and headed out to drop off the beebee at the daycare, it was a little awkward making the new girl walk all the way across the building to get it from me and she was looking at me like a retard who is making her go out of her way for no reason but I explained to her that Laine was right on the other side of the window and I didn’t’ want her to see me and I apologies to her for inconveniencing her but by the time I was in my car I was ready to turn back around and give her what for, I mean what am I paying them for anyway. To take care of my kid while I can’t and that includes keeping her out of eyesight if it keeps her happy. Jeez.
Anyway, I then head out to Pearland for my appointment. I get there after a quick stop at Walgreens for a bottle of water and some altoids, yeah I forgot to brush my teeth before going someplace where there was a good possibility a doctor may want to look at my newly healed throat. And he did and I was glad I stopped first.
I got to the office and had to wait a while to get the paperwork to fill out as a new patient and my lord in heaven batman, if I knew my future grandchildren’s social security numbers they would have forced it out of me with bamboo under my nails, how the heck should I know when I got my chicken pox I was like four years old and how would I know if I was vaccinated for hep b when I was an infant? I was an infant. PFT! So I finish laboring my way through page after page of paperwork and hand it over to the nurse who holds my insurance card hostage until the nurse gives it back when I’m already in the exam room.
Are you noticing a pattern here, me making a huge deal and being greatly bothered by nothing? Yeah, that had been my life for like two weeks and I could see and hear myself being ridiculous and was powerless to stop it.
So I’m in the exam room and I’m getting weighed and my blood pressure and temp is taken. I weigh exactly the same as I did that morning at home (176) and my blood pressure was almost exactly what it was the other day at moms house (177/72) and my temp was exactly the same as the night before (95.7) which all three being the same is kind of weird right?
The nurse talked to me for almost a half an hour, asking me all kinds of questions and writing down all my answers I think verbatim because she filled out almost three sheets of paper. She was super attentive and incredibly intuitive. I liked her a lot, she didn’t’ smile too much and just did her job but in a nice lady kind of way and I like that. After she left it was only about two minutes before I met the most wonderful man in the whole world next to my dad, and my husband and my grandpa and my grandpa and my brother and my son and his brother but you get the point. Besides all the big greats he’s next. He’s a jolly man in a plaid shirt and suspenders. If you ever wondered what Saint Nic does on his time off, now you know. He’s my doctor. And he’s amazing. He talked to me for almost an hour and a half , just me and him. Even when the blood was being all CBC’d or whatever he sat next to me and had me walk him through the last three weeks, every drug I’d been put on and how they effected me, every day I spent laying down and resting versus the days I was up and active and how I felt each of those type of days versus the other. He asked me how long I’d been having allergy problems and I told him I hadn’t had allergies since last spring with I got house arrested by the pollen. But he kept on the allergy point, asking me why I was sniffing so often and I was all “I’m not sniffing, I don’t’ have a runny nose or anything, no itchy runny eyes, no sneezing no nothing” he just said okay and then kept talking about other tuff but pointing out each time I sniffed. I never realized how often I do that. It had made me thoroughly self conscious about it. So then he started asking me about my joints and had any of them become stiff or sore, I told him my shoulders and neck feel like they have a constant crick in them but I just figured it was from laying on the couch for so long and so often. He put his had on the back of my neck and started rotating my neck and the only pain I felt was a tightening in the center of the back of my neck and a pulling at my shoulders. He then asked me to sniff and I did then he pinched whatever muscle gets used while sniffing and I just about fell off my chair, I went all blurry eyed and I swear I almost screamed out loud. I’ve never felt the pain of giving birth through my neck before but now I have. He told me it hurts because I have a couple of pulled muscles and he thinks an pinched nerve too. I couldn’t believe it, I told him It didn’t’ feel pinched and pulled and I really don’t feel like I have allergies and I can’t believe that he’s getting all this from :I have a headache” and he just told me it was because I’m not a titty baby. Yeah, my amazing doctor broke it down to that simple fact and from that point on he started to seriously question me about my headache and how it hurt and where it hurt and how often and when it hurts worse and less because if I don’t’ even notice pinched nerves and pulled muscle but my headache was putting me on my ass he knew it must really hurt me.
I can’t even tell you, I still want to cry from the absolute happiness I felt just to have a doctor take me seriously. He talked to me and he logically walked through every problem I have and her treated each one with equal seriousness and all I can say is that I think I’m in love. I’ll never go to another doctor again if he’s this amazing every time.
Anyhow, my tumor turned out to be allergies. My glands are so swollen that they are putting pressure on all my next and shoulder muscles which paired with my sniffling is pulling and pinching at things it normally wouldn’t. And my swollen sinuses are what was making my head hurt worse that it already was from the tension headaches I’ve been getting from stress. This is the only thing I’m skeptical about . it went like this. Him: are you under an unusual about of stress? Me: no, not really. I have a 19 month old and a husband and a job and a home to care for and bills to pay just like every other married mother in the world, no more or less stress than anyone else. Him: well for some people that is too much stress. Me: not for me it isn’t. Him: for your body it might be.
He’s sharp he’s got wit and he’s quick with his comebacks and I think that might be why I take him at his word. So I can take Alive while I am on my meds but once I’m off them and if the headaches continue he told me to try tension headache medication instead of the migraine meds that weren’t helping much.
So I asked him about my meds, if I should just take Claritin or Benadryl for the allergies and he said we were way beyond that and he’s got me on some antibiotic that has like three warnings about the effects on my GI tract and some steroids that in the instructions it talks about how it’s used to treat liver disease, kidney disease, a thyroid disorder, a history of malaria, tuberculosis, osteoporosis, herpes infection of the eyes, stomach ulcers, ulcerative colitis, or diverticulitis, depression or mental illness, congestive heart failure, or high blood pressure. WTF?! I didn’t even know there was suck a thing as herpes of the eye. Anyhow that’s what I’m taking and so far so good. He gave me a shot in my butt too and within about six hours my headache was completely gone. It was the first night of total rest I’ve gotten in over three weeks. I can’t even put into words my bliss. It thought I could handle a little headache, a big headache and a migraine even but apparently eighteen days strait of no relief had done very bad things to me.
So today I’m awake and I have more energy that every day in the last three weeks combined and I am looking forward to going home tonight and finish cleaning my house that I started on last night. It was such an epiphany to finally have my head clear and be feeling no pain, it was like a veil was lifted and I could see the wreck my house was where before I didn’t’ care at all what was stuck in my carpet or what was hiding under Laine’s crib (three diapers ugh!) So I got he kitchen living room dining room Laine’s room and my room cleaned and ready for Katia to come on down!
Everyone at work today has commented on how much better I look, and I don’t’ blame them in the slightest, I do look damn good today, my pants are clean and my shirt isn’t wrinkled and my hair is brushed and I have on makeup.
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| So that’s it, end of story. I’m fixed. |
Friday, October 1
I Need Better Drugs
It’s been a while since I wrote a this-was-my-day-recap blog. And yesterday wasn’t really a recap worthy day but the truth is I’ve got nothing else.
I woke up late yesterday morning, usually I’m up and in the shower no later than 5:30 and down stairs dressed and doing the laudry from the day before. I make Erik’s lunch and I set out his clothes and I grab a diaper and head upstairs to wake up laine and get her situated for the day. This typically all ends up with Laine and I in the car at 6:40 and me on the road for work no later than 7:00 to arrive no later than 7:30 so that I can’ make charlies coffee before 7:45. But yesterday I didn’t wake up until 6:50 so I wasn’t able to take a shower and when I ran downstairs to get erik’s lunch together Laine woke up and was hollering so loud it woke Erik up so he grabbed her and brought her down for me, changed and dressed her while I got his clothes laid out and my breakfast in a bag to take in the car with me and we were out the door at 7:20 and I didn’t get on the road for work until 7:35. I had very little gas so I took 518 instead of the freeway to conserve it a bit and I had to stop at CVS for Excedrin Migraine and I walked into the front office at 8:20. With Charlie standing there asking me where the coffee was.
That was how my day started, and it continued for me in more or less the same vein. I ate my rationed handful of honeydew melon and watched a little TV, I played my facebook games and tried to write a little in the Borrowing Jacob notebook. But starting at around 9:00 the Excedrin I took started wearing off and by 10:00 it was gone completely. You’re only supposed to take two Excedrin in Twenty-four hours and by the time I went to bed last night I’d taken eight. Hopefully my new doctor will fix this on Monday.
At lunch I made a bowl of soup but could only get about half of it down before my head started pounding with each bite and chew so I had to stop and just sit with my eyes closed until the throbbing stopped. I ate another handful of honeydew melon later and wasn’t missing the soup that much. Around 3:30 I took some more Excedrin, made myself a cup of tea and turned my lights off for some quiet time. By 5:00 I was more than ready to get out of there.
I picked Laine up at daycare right after 6:00 and she was crying so hard for daddy, they said that she’d been fine all day but that some man had come in for his son and since then she’d been hollering. So I took her home and set her up in her highchair to eat some ravioli and oranges and she stayed happy enough for me to start on dinner, but not quite finish it. So for the last ten minutes of getting the casserole ready for the oven laine was screaming “MamaMamaMama” over and over and over until I was finally done and got her out and cleaned her up and took her upstairs for a bath. Since I’d missed my shower that morning I just climbed in with her. We took almost a half an hour together just playing and splashing and washing each others hands and feet but then the water hitting my legs started pounding in my head and I got a little dizzy so I got us out and dried off and handed her over to Erik so I could finish dinner. I took some more Excedrin and cleaned up the kitchen and was all good again by the time Colleen came over for our Thursday Night thing that still doesn’t have a name.
She watched me eat and then we drank so amazing chocolate raspberry coffee that she’d brought over and watched Bones and Grays and Private Practice and it was good. She left right at ten to head home and I went upstairs and climbed into bed for some sleep before I needed to take more Excedrin and failed so I had Erik bring me some up and I got some good sleep until around 1:00 when Laine woke up and stayed up until close to 5:00. I woke up Erik to take her at 4:00 but her crying kept me up, she wasn’t not feeling well she just wanted to get down and play and we weren’t’ letting her so she was pissed. Finally she wore herself and Erik out and we slept again until Erik’s alarm woke me up at 7:10… So we’ve started all over again. It’s now 9:00 and I’ve already taken 4 Excedrin and I’m feeling okay right now. Tonight I’m giving a presentation or speech or something with my family at a Pregnancy Center’s fund raiser in Pasadena and tomorrow I have a family reunion in the Woodlands that will last the whole day. Sunday I plan to take it way easy and Monday I get to meet my new doctor, I just pray he takes me seriously and fixes my head.
I woke up late yesterday morning, usually I’m up and in the shower no later than 5:30 and down stairs dressed and doing the laudry from the day before. I make Erik’s lunch and I set out his clothes and I grab a diaper and head upstairs to wake up laine and get her situated for the day. This typically all ends up with Laine and I in the car at 6:40 and me on the road for work no later than 7:00 to arrive no later than 7:30 so that I can’ make charlies coffee before 7:45. But yesterday I didn’t wake up until 6:50 so I wasn’t able to take a shower and when I ran downstairs to get erik’s lunch together Laine woke up and was hollering so loud it woke Erik up so he grabbed her and brought her down for me, changed and dressed her while I got his clothes laid out and my breakfast in a bag to take in the car with me and we were out the door at 7:20 and I didn’t get on the road for work until 7:35. I had very little gas so I took 518 instead of the freeway to conserve it a bit and I had to stop at CVS for Excedrin Migraine and I walked into the front office at 8:20. With Charlie standing there asking me where the coffee was.
That was how my day started, and it continued for me in more or less the same vein. I ate my rationed handful of honeydew melon and watched a little TV, I played my facebook games and tried to write a little in the Borrowing Jacob notebook. But starting at around 9:00 the Excedrin I took started wearing off and by 10:00 it was gone completely. You’re only supposed to take two Excedrin in Twenty-four hours and by the time I went to bed last night I’d taken eight. Hopefully my new doctor will fix this on Monday.
At lunch I made a bowl of soup but could only get about half of it down before my head started pounding with each bite and chew so I had to stop and just sit with my eyes closed until the throbbing stopped. I ate another handful of honeydew melon later and wasn’t missing the soup that much. Around 3:30 I took some more Excedrin, made myself a cup of tea and turned my lights off for some quiet time. By 5:00 I was more than ready to get out of there.
I picked Laine up at daycare right after 6:00 and she was crying so hard for daddy, they said that she’d been fine all day but that some man had come in for his son and since then she’d been hollering. So I took her home and set her up in her highchair to eat some ravioli and oranges and she stayed happy enough for me to start on dinner, but not quite finish it. So for the last ten minutes of getting the casserole ready for the oven laine was screaming “MamaMamaMama” over and over and over until I was finally done and got her out and cleaned her up and took her upstairs for a bath. Since I’d missed my shower that morning I just climbed in with her. We took almost a half an hour together just playing and splashing and washing each others hands and feet but then the water hitting my legs started pounding in my head and I got a little dizzy so I got us out and dried off and handed her over to Erik so I could finish dinner. I took some more Excedrin and cleaned up the kitchen and was all good again by the time Colleen came over for our Thursday Night thing that still doesn’t have a name.
She watched me eat and then we drank so amazing chocolate raspberry coffee that she’d brought over and watched Bones and Grays and Private Practice and it was good. She left right at ten to head home and I went upstairs and climbed into bed for some sleep before I needed to take more Excedrin and failed so I had Erik bring me some up and I got some good sleep until around 1:00 when Laine woke up and stayed up until close to 5:00. I woke up Erik to take her at 4:00 but her crying kept me up, she wasn’t not feeling well she just wanted to get down and play and we weren’t’ letting her so she was pissed. Finally she wore herself and Erik out and we slept again until Erik’s alarm woke me up at 7:10… So we’ve started all over again. It’s now 9:00 and I’ve already taken 4 Excedrin and I’m feeling okay right now. Tonight I’m giving a presentation or speech or something with my family at a Pregnancy Center’s fund raiser in Pasadena and tomorrow I have a family reunion in the Woodlands that will last the whole day. Sunday I plan to take it way easy and Monday I get to meet my new doctor, I just pray he takes me seriously and fixes my head.