I Hate Tuedays

If I could have a super power I would want to be able to make Tuesday’s disappear, and force a double up on Thursdays. I can’t tell you how badly I want every Tuesday that ever was to be… what’s a good word that means: If Tuesday was a person I’d want it to be ripped out of the week by its pubic hairs and forced to sit in an acid bath with Paris Hilton in an evil spa in some seriously intense hell for all eternity? To say I want Tuesdays to “go away” doesn’t seem to really capture the severity of my dislike of that day.
I can’t even really remember the last time I had a good Tuesday, at least not one that wasn’t either preceded by a bad Monday or followed by a bad Wednesday. Every Tuesday is my own personal apocalypse with flying lion/scorpion/man beasts and everything. Each Tuesday has Armageddon reproduced for me personally. Garfield’s hate of Mondays can’t touch my hate of Tuesdays. Lasagna doesn’t even come close to fixing a Tuesday.
What I hate most about Tuesdays it that if Monday was bad, it doesn't get washed away by the new day. Tomorrows are never better if they are Tuesdays.